Forget the Flowers—This Mother’s Day, I Just Want Time to Write
Things I learned in my first year of motherhood and how wanting time away from your baby does NOT make you a bad mom!!
People say motherhood changes everything.
And it does.
But what they don’t always say is that you’re still in there. Even when you feel like a different version of yourself. Even when you struggle to find time for yourself, your usual moments of silence are now filled with cries, giggles, and babbles.
What I’m wearing: Hello Updo scarf, Sézane earrings, necklace + bangles, GAP x HFR Collab White Button Up, Citizens of Humanity white pants, Tory Burch denim mules.
This past year, I became someone’s mother. But I also stayed a writer. An entrepreneur. A creative. A friend. A partner. A daughter. And somehow, all those roles had to learn to live beside each other.
On this Mother’s Day, I want to reflect on some of the biggest lessons I’ve learned in my first year of motherhood. I shared a post about this on my Instagram, but let’s go a little bit deeper.
You don’t need a routine to be a good mom.
I’m definitely a type B mom. While structure is helpful, so is intuition. Some days are a bit chaotic, while others flow. Every day is different, and that doesn’t make you disorganized. It makes you adaptable. I had to learn to trust myself and not what I saw online.
Rest is real work.
You’re not behind. Not in your career, not in your creativity, not in your glow up. You’re becoming (shoutout to Michelle Obama). Resting doesn’t mean you’ve stopped. It means you’re building something deeper. Every time I paused to breathe, I found clarity I couldn’t reach in the hustle.
You can love your baby and still want space.
Motherhood is consuming. It pulls you in all directions. Wanting solitude doesn’t make you less loving. Craving solitude makes you human. Maybe it’s because I’m an only child, but sometimes I just want to sit in silence, to write, to read, sometimes to cry, to be. And I’m learning not to apologize for that.
Entrepreneurship in motherhood is a lot. But it’s not possible.
I have a whole new respect for working moms. I’m grateful that I can do my work from home and be at home to watch Noka grow. However, it’s still really hard. I’ve had to take client calls with toys on the floor, lead team meetings with a baby on my hip, write and edit articles in bed, and build pitch decks after everyone in my house is asleep. It’s definitely not cute most of the time, but I make it work.
Friendships shift.
Maybe I should write a Substack about this one because it shocked me. Some friendships will fade. Some will grow and show up louder than ever. Both will teach you something. Motherhood taught me who I could vent to and who I can’t. And that’s okay. I’m learning to hold space for what was and what is.
This year definitely cracked me open. But in the cracks, I found softness. I found strength. I’m still finding me.
If this resonates with you, share it with a friend. Or tell me what motherhood has taught you lately.
xx,
Kelsey
P.S. I linked everything that I am wearing in these pics here.
Happy mother's day to you Kelsey! I relate to this so much as an entrepreneur and "type B" mama as well 🤗 it's so true what you've said about friendships shifting, the ones who really showed up on the messiest and sleepiest of days are such meaningful relationships now 🩷
Kelsey, this was honest in the best way. You didn’t try to make motherhood look glossy. You made it sound true. That line “You can love your baby and still want space” that one right there? That’s the line that frees people. You’re not just writing as a mom, you’re writing as a whole person remembering she still exists, still matters, still wants to create.